Money: Are You Using It To Harm Or Heal Yourself And Others?

For the past few years I’ve been studying the way that money is used, not only by myself but by all people. Going way beyond the tired conversation of scarcity and lack that is so prevalent in the online coaching space, which has made the word mindset a household term known by those with even the slightest desire for transformation, I’ve been digging deeper into how we actually use our money to express who we are, what we believe about ourselves and the world around us.


In my own pursuit to understand clearly the relationship I have to money, I’ve gone through many stages of awareness, and will continue too I’m sure as my understanding evolves over time. Here I’ve outlined the stages I’ve gone through myself to help you identify how you use money as a tool to either harm or heal, yourself and others. Through understanding your own relationship to money as a tool to harm or heal, you can make a conscious choice to direct the flow of money in your life and the lives of others, as an expression of your values.

Initially, I had to become aware of the fact that me and money had had a pretty disappointing relationship for most of my life. It began with hearing how money was always the cause of unhappiness in other people’s lives, which is also the prevalent mindset of the world as a whole today. From that I unconsciously made money mean it would be the cause of my unhappiness as well, so anytime I had it I felt compelled to spend it, give it away or refuse to receive it all.

That led to a life of having what I needed, but rarely having anything more than that. There were the odd times of course when I wanted something that required more than my usual requirements and in that case, I always found a way to make the money happen. I can’t say that there has ever been anything that I really wanted, that I didn’t get. Although at the time, I likely spent months or perhaps even years telling myself that I couldn’t have what I wanted because I didn’t have the money. And I couldn’t get the money because of a whole list of reasons I believed were beyond my control, but true in my belief nonetheless.


In hindsight I can see clearly that the things I thought I wanted, but didn’t have the money to get, I really didn’t want after all.

In fact, as far as I can recollect there was always a clear feeling of doubt or indecision that accompanied my desire which I can now see was my higher Self trying to steer me in a direction that really would provide the happiness I longed for. Not just the temporary feeling of satisfaction that an increase in the flow of money brings.


Before you go assuming that this was actually a block that my subconscious mind created to limit my belief that I could have more, as is the prevalent belief in the online space, hear me out. It is true that the ego mind will use doubt and indecision to prevent us from gaining clarity about what it is we want. But if we view money as sacred, and therefore not separate from the Source of everything in the Universe, and we accept that there is a Divine plan not only for our own lives but for the world as a whole, one that is kind, loving and eternal, then even the ego mind with all it’s diversionary tactics and fear based antics is a part of that Divine plan or Universal Order.

As I started to question the value of teaching other women how to make money I also had to question what I had learned myself in the process of going from earning $20,000 a year to more than that in a day. As I broke free of the apparent financial constraints that I believed had been the cause of my feeling trapped, limited and unhappy with myself and the conditions of life, my first reaction was to share this new found knowledge with other women so they too could be free.

I soon found though that not only was my happiness fleeting despite the new wealth I had created, so was the happiness of my clients.

It didn’t matter how many income goals we reached, how many limiting beliefs were transformed, how many programs were launched or how many clients were helped, on a daily basis when I spoke to my clients they were still unhappy, and I was stressed out. It didn’t matter how much transformation was happening in our lives, it was never enough.


That sent me on an entirely different trajectory with my work as the vehicle to help me heal my relationship with money and uncover the real value of my contribution to the world. As I began to open my mind to new possibilities for why I had learned what I had and entertained the notion that there really is a DIvine plan at play at all times in our lives, I started to see how money was not separate from that plan but actually an integral part of our collective healing.

Money is a tool beyond measure in its capacity to both harm and heal, the only difference being the perception of the person using it and their awareness of the power they hold to direct its flow.


As I began to view money as unlimited not only in its abundance and availability to everyone, but also in its capacity to heal rather than harm, a whole new path of learning begin to emerge. Everything that I had learned about limiting beliefs needed to be questioned and I started to see how the very ‘rules’ we learn to break free of our apparent limitations, can also be used to keep us trapped in the endless cycle of feeling like no matter what we have, it’s never ENOUGH.


So I started to look at my entire life through the lens that if there really was a Divine plan that governed everything, including my life within the Universal Order, then I had to look closely at the particular circumstances of my own life as being significant in my education of who I really am, beyond all the conditioned beliefs I had learned until now. It was clear that my life had been noticeably marked by a desire to understand who I was spiritually and to eliminate any and all barriers between my spiritual understanding of Self, and who I was as an individual conditioned by my small self, or ego mind.

I determined that if we are all created as infinite beings with no other purpose but to recognize our true nature, then with money being the so called ‘cause’ of man’s unhappiness, it too must figure prominently in the story of humanity’s conscious return to wholeness. As I began observing myself, my clients and other women as teachers and healers rather than entrepreneurs and business owners, I noticed that it wasn’t so much what we were all doing that was the problem. It was why we were doing it.

I found myself asking, to what end are we building this wealth for ourselves and our businesses?

Many of my clients express a deep desire to use their wealth to benefit others, and I believe that to be true. But here’s where the Divine Order of the Universe, the very Source we acknowledge is the supply of our infinite prosperity, gets thrown out the window. In our pursuit to fulfill our personal dreams we seek ever increasing wealth, prosperity and abundance for ourselves but we soon find that it’s never enough no matter how much we have. And because our desire for more only increases with every increase in our bank accounts, our desire to use our wealth for the benefit of all is perpetually delayed until some day off in a distant future when we believe that we will finally be fulfilled enough to share our wealth with others for the purpose of healing, on the grand scale that we imagine is possible.

This of course begs the question, why wait? Why wait until some day to do good when we can all do good right now? And this is where the Divine Order of the Universe gets picked up once again, for if we are here to know who we really are as infinite eternal beings, then we must all learn to trust that and be willing to extend that belief to one another. Unfortunately, we live in a world that is largely made of up of the haves and have nots but our collective perception of that reality is precisely what is undergoing a huge transformation.

The ego mind, which was perceived when man separated from his true identity or Divine beingness, taught us to view ourselves as victims of a world that is beyond our control. But as we become more aware of the voice within us that never goes away nor is ever separate from the Divine, we no longer view the world as one in which we compete for anything, including resources. Today women around the world are healing their relationship to money and transforming the collective belief that we are victims of an unjust world.

However, as our awareness continues to grow it’s no longer enough to amass wealth solely for our own good without extending the truth to others that all beings are creators and are born to experience the abundance that we have tapped into. The online coaching space dramatizes the gap between the haves and the have nots as a microcosm of the wounding that has yet to be healed in the world’s economic reality.

Just as the spiritual world when seen as something separate from the physical world, is a misperception manufactured by the ego mind to prevent man from knowing his true nature, so too it is false to view anything as separate from the Divine Order of the Universe.

Economics, the environment, politics, health, education, they’re all spiritual paths when we choose to view them as such, which is precisely what is being asked of us. When we no longer view our relationship to money, or anything or anyone, as outside of the spiritual realm but rather as a the vehicles through which humanity learns to heal itself, our power and purpose is transformed from self-centered and fragmented to whole and inclusive.

As we come to know ourselves as the Divine beings that we all are, we’re asked to extend that knowing to everything and everyone and in so doing, together we transform and heal us all.

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